The road ahead

[morleyroarly]

For those of you following along at home, life sure is crazy here in Pittsburgh.  This week has been an emotional rollercoaster, and I imagine the next few months will continue to toss my heart and soul like a tasty crunchy organic salad.

Decisions have been made. A path is being carved out, and only time will tell where that path will lead.

The background: as many of you know, I've been battling some pretty hardcore depression basically since I arrived. It's understandable - I've uprooted myself from everything and everyone I know to come to a new city, a new job, and a new life with Tom.  Adjustments are rough. The depression has taken its toll on both me personally and on the
relationship.  

As such, Tom and I have decided that I'm going to move out for a while. I'm staying in Pittsburgh - living with friends across town (THANK YOU Claire and Jeff!) - but Tom and I are going to try *not* cohabitating for a while. We never really dated, so we're going to give that a try in the hopes that we can rebuild our day-to-day relationship on a steadier footing.

Annnnnd... wait for it... I'm going to burning man!  I swore up and down I wouldn't go this year, but with all of the chaos in my life right now I think it might be a really good opportunity for me.  So, I booked my ticket to Reno (only $299 on Southwest, woohoo!), got my vacation time, and the deal is sealed.

As such, I'm on the lookout for a not-exhorbitantly-expensive entry ticket, a ride to/from the airport (Arriving Tuesday night 10pm, departing Sunday 3:30pm), and a playa bike.  Holler if you have any leads!  I have no idea where I'm camping yet, but I'll let you know when I decide.  I look forward to seeing some of you out there!

And lastly, I want to thank everyone who  has supported Tom and myself through these amazingly rewarding and difficult months.  Even though we haven't seen you much in person, the words and phone calls and emails and good vibes have helped tremendously.

I love you all!

*sniff*

Now let's go blow some stuff up!!!!

Comments

[threadwalker.livejournal.com]

Good ideas on both counts, and glad you're coming to the playa. I thought I wasn't going either, but that may have changed...

[dougygyro.livejournal.com]

Yay! Can't wait to see you up in the desert.

Glad to hear things are starting to work out. Best of luck for the future, and let's catch up at BRC.

[threadwalker.livejournal.com]

I didn't know you know Morley. The world gets smaller and smaller.

[dougygyro.livejournal.com]

Sweetie, I know everybody. :p

[amphitrite27.livejournal.com]

I think this is a good plan. A trip to clear your head, re-find *you* among friends and re-invigorate that part of yourself. Then being able to bring that back to where you are now...live in a prettier part of town, in a different sitch and date!

Marriage seems lovely (except for weddings ;) but dating is pretty alright too!

Whatever happens, I'm sure that your journey will lead you to yourself and to the best you you can be. I'm sorry that road isn't always easy. Although if it was easy, what would you with all of the rest of your days?

[nifercritter.livejournal.com]

YAYYYYYY!!!


xoxoxoxox!

[tantrumgalore.livejournal.com]

*hugs* -- I appreciate hearing about people who try different things to make it work, and it sounds like you both are doing phenomenal things to overcome some big challenges and adjust to the changes. GO YOU!!!

and i'm SO glad to hear you're going to the burn this year!

[headlouse.livejournal.com]

I swear the playa has magnetic properties -- you, me, and everyone just keeps getting dragged back year after year.

I think you are making the right move on all counts: Giving yourself some time to clear your head and hopefully find a new way forward. And I may be biased since I want to see you so bad, but I think a trip to the playa is actually a great idea too.

[helianthas.livejournal.com]

Hey, I came over here via tom... I moved across the country for my bf, too (although we'd been dating already for a few years, 2 close and 1 long distance). It was so, so hard, and I also got very depressed, very isolated, and felt like my whole world -- friends, socializing -- was all me moving into his world. Sadly, I freaked out and picked a fight and just... moved out w/o us really working on our issues. It sounds like you guys are talking, which is great. But don't blame the relationship per se. Work on your depression, for sure, with therapy/meds/holistic, whatever your bent is, but DEF work on it, actively. And, this was the most important thing for me -- try to make your own friends. Believe it or not, I found CraigsList amazingly helpful. I met some people I didn't click with, but also met some cool girls that I still hang out with and became good friends. Also classes, or stitch-n-bitch nights if you're crafty are good ways. Seriously, having your own group of friends to go out with makes co-habiting soooo much easier. Friends who moved in with their bf's (usually now husbands) say that the first 6 months were miserable, and slowly after that it got better (of course, none of my friends who gave this advice also switched jobs or states, like we did), but give yourselves a good chance -- not all of us handle stressful situations as well, and knowing that the 1st year of cohabitation is hard for everyone may make you somewhat more willing to ride it out.

now, of course i know NOTHING about you, so feel free to summarily dismiss all I say! :P

[methanopyrus.livejournal.com]

These sound like good choices! I am glad to hear about them. :)

[gern.livejournal.com]

Progress is good and it sounds like a plan that could work out well. Hope to cross paths with you out at the burn!

[jedipussytricks.livejournal.com]

Those sound like great decisions.

I'm glad you've got friends you can move in with, too, both because it's nice to have people around at home sometimes and because it gives you more flexibility than you'd probably have with your own lease. Plus, you won't have to furnish a whole place on your own! :)

And Burning Man sounds like a great way to do the "get away from it all for a little while" thing without sacrificing opportunities to keep establishing relationships and ties in Pittsburgh.

Great compromises all around!

Fandango?

[netzard.livejournal.com]

You can always camp with Fandango. you know you are welcome with us.

It will be fab to see you regardless. Come by for a visit. i'll be out there all week.

[nat-marion.livejournal.com]

I think you're making some good albeit hard choices. and...


Yay! we must meet up on the playa! I'm so excited about BM!!! its all i think about now, and now im even more excited cause i get to meet you! :)

Thanks so much for the packing list btw. Its saving me :)

[gorillashaman.livejournal.com]

*HUG*

[tarin-yote.livejournal.com]

OH SHIT MORLEY! I'VE BEEN MEANING TO TALK TO YOU!

I hope yer doing well and I SOOOOO wanna see you on the playa this year ^^

[tarin-yote.livejournal.com]

er... sorry was on a friend's compy :P

That was me, Strife / James L. :P